Lately the Lord has been working on my heart in how I'm spending my days. My hearts desire is that I'm intentional with my time and interactions. Most days I feel like I fail miserably in this journey. House chores seem to become a domino effect as I set out to just clean up breakfast and end up starting laundry, loading the dishwasher, straightening up and putting away clutter...then before I know it I feel like I've lost most of the morning to "busyness" when all I really wanted to do was connect with my children.
I know all of these household duties need to be done and at this point and time I can't do them during nap time because I myself need a little nap; however, I don't want to miss out on the most important thing about me being at home each day and that is to raise our children up in the Lord. I want them to see that I put Christ first and at the start of my day. I want them to see my mind rest from racing thoughts on the to-do list and just be with them. I want to teach them. I want to soak in this stage of life.
While these emotions are going through my head it always turns my thoughts to the area of guilt and how much that has creeped into my life since becoming a mom. I know most parents can relate to this feeling even when doing ridiculous tasks like taking a shower and yet feeling guilty because your not with your kids. Well, with this I've been praying for freedom from this and wisdom to know when it's valid or not. One of these areas of guilt for me was getting ready each morning. I felt guilty cleaning up a bit. Nothing extreme just changing out of pj's, brushing hair and teeth and maybe putting on some makeup. I'm learning that this isn't something I should feel bad about. I need to model to my children getting ready in the morning isn't a bad thing and it to has to be done just like laundry and dishes.
I found a blessing in this journey the other morning when Little Miss was getting ready with me and it dawned on me that she now get's ready alongside me. She's doing big girl things like brushing her own teeth without much help as well as being able to cup her hand to bring water to her mouth to rinse. When did she get so big and who taught her that? Oh...wait....it was me....when I was modeling to her how to get ready in the mornings. VICTORY! I know this may seem obvious as well as silly to others but to me it was big. Thank you Jesus for showing me importance in the little things. You are always victorious over the things the enemy can try and use to bring me down.
Fix my eyes on you and show me the story through your eyes.